I heard an advertisement for UPN Channel 13 News doing a special report about kids and coffee. Apparently, by allowing kids to drink coffee, parents are subjecting their children to the dangers of addiction. This breaking news report is all about how the caffeine in coffee can lead to a lifetime of addiction! And they complemented the report with soundbytes of kids saying things like "I love coffee...I drink it all the time."
Who, may I ask, is doing this report? Mormons?? What are they talking about?? I drink coffee all the time! I don't have an addiction!! (twitch twitch) Caffeine's addictive?! No I'm not having convulsions...I'm normally hyper! I don't know what they're talking about. (twitch twitch) Really. Nu-uh. Nope. No addiction here. Nope. Caffeine's addictive? Who ever heard of that? What twitch?